happy birthday Zoë

Wishing my lil princess a happy 6th bday.though we may not know your exact bday one thing I am certain of is that somewhere in China your birth parents are thinking of you.their love and care that 1st year helped you become the great kid you are .Zoë on this special day when you should get presents it has been us that recd the most precious gift being your family.I hope that today and everyday is full of sunshine and happiness

Zoe's Hospital Adventure

Days 1-5 in hospital

Waking up-not in vegas
Posted Jun 26, 2009 4:35pm
Zoe has been very slowly waking up and coming out of her sleep. She would wake up look around try to fight the breathing tube and then fall back asleep They removed the breathing tube about 2 hrs ago. Zoe is running a slight fever(101 ish) so she has been given Tylenol. She also was given a block similar to an epidural that should help control pain for several more hours.Zoe looked much better than I thought she would . She had a breathing tube and still has 3 differentIV, a chest tube -this will stay in a couple of days,and a catheter.Zoe also participated n a new study testing a machine that can detect the amount of blood flow in a child. Currently the procedure used is very invasive involving a balloon and stopping the blood flow. The testing was all done using the iv already in place so there was no additional stress for Zoe.I did find out that she did receive the "clean" blood. All in all the day so far has gone better than I expected. thank you to all of those that have said a prayer or had a good thought.Saturday she will be more alert and will be able to see aunt shell and uncle Rick and grandma and enjoy the huge, snugly pink bear the purple horse

how many disney movies can we watch in 12 hours?
Posted Jun 27, 2009 10:37am
Zoe has been a champ.She has not been complaining or fighting any of the tubes or procedures that have occurred.It might have been nice to have been warned about the 4am chest xray(to check chest tube-normal) instead of being woken up by the lead apron being dropped on me... but thats ok it gave us a reason to watch Enchanted. I am so thrilled that she is doing so well... what a weight lifted. It has been a great strength to read the kind words from our extended friends and adoption family. I know that it has been everyones thoughts and prayers that help her and me come thru this surgery. I also feel anew the gratefulness and awe I feel towards Zoe's birth parents,that they were able to after spending a year with this beautiful child know that she would need to leave them in order to be healed. They were so unselfish in giving her up.I am truly thankful that I have never been in that position.
Zoe is currently playing with her sticker book. Little miss independent..She has stated that she is hungry hopefully it won't be too much longer before she can have some food. They will be removed one of her ivs today. oh she is saying she is hungry again and "mama get me some food" it might be a long day... We are looking forward to a visit from her bros and sisters as well as being able to see gramma and aunt shell and uncle Rick .
Thank you all so much for your continued support and love for my girl.Just as I have a special place in my heart for all of your children I know my Zoe has a place in yours.Thanks of course to our Gracious God for this beautiful girl and for allowing us to be her family.

Moving right along....
Posted Jun 28, 2009 3:16am
Zoe has continued to amaze me with her strength and ability to roll with the changes. I do not think many adults would be doing so well. Zoe has been getting up and using the bathroom, quite a mission with all the things still attached to her. She still has he central line in(neck),chest tube,iv,heart leads as well as all the 3 diff little lines going to the iv. Zoe said " i love you" I said " I love you too honey" she said " no, I want food"... i was close!! She was teary eyed, sad faced asking for food. This girl likes to eat maybe in the am. Thanks again for all your thoughts and prayers.... peace and happiness Bonnie


food glorious food
Posted June 29,2009 2pm
Zoe has been moving around like a monkey... no concern at all that she has a chest tube in.They removed her central line (neck),just a little crying when Nurse Shannon was scrubbing the stitches.She still has alot of fluid draining from the chest tube to remove it. I believe it has to be out for 24 hrs before she can be discharge.So maybe tuesday or weds?? home??
Zoe played some games and did some neat crafts with the child life volunteer.She was able to start with some ginger ale and then some pudding. We had a visit from Big sisters Shari and Kelli and her bro Desmond,nephew Evan had to stay in the waiting room but mama enjoyed some time with her newest grandson. Shari did not even get us kicked out of the hospital but it was a close call!!!
Zoe's dinner came and her sibs left .I think they did out of fear.Zoe attacked her tofu raviolis, I was afraid she was going to eat the plate. After dinner we went for a couple of walks and watched The incredibles.
We had a bit of a rough night as Zoe woke at midnight on the wet side and was not a happy camper. She cried for an hour,longer than I have seen her cry .She finally went back to sleep after having a story read. I offered to sing to her but she mumbles something about nightmares and went to sleep.. She has woken up this morning needing a blood draw that of course could not be thru her IV. She was a trooper and has had her big bright smile on ever since. She is currently playing chutes and ladders while waiting for the play deck to open. Hurray we will be going out of the unit..
Yesterday the Dr did say that she still has a small murmur most likely a stitch or two on the patch did not hold but hopefully this will be covered as the tissue covers the patch. Thanks again for all the good wishes.
peace and happiness Bonnie


Day 5
Posted 9 am June 30
Zoe has been doing well. We had a very quiet night.She has been very clingy It will be nice to get back home so I can be ignored and shut in my room!! We won't be going home today ,hopefully the chest tube will come out soon and then we can be home. I am ok with this delay as I would rather have it be in one day longer than have to be put back in or have us have to come back up here. She is doing amazingly well. You would never know to look at her that she had open heart surgery 5 days ago or that she has a chest tube in. Yesterday we visited the playroom in the reg peds deck where Desi spent 3 weeks 5 summers ago! There is much more activity there, more kids and many more drs. Zoe wanted to move down where the action is but thankfully we have stayed put in this nice quiet corner. We also visited the playdeck(roof top play area) and will be going there for a picnic lunch this noon. Yesterday there was an alarm and all the doors were shut. 6 firetrucks came to the hospital. Later they said it was a drill.?? Desi called to see if I had brought all my cards with me as he saw something he "had to have" .I am sure that was just an excuse to hear my voice!!! LOL.
I am very lucky that I am able to take this time off work and that my insurance will cover almost all expenses. There are many families in here not so fortunate and their kids are here mostly alone because the parents have to stay working.
Thanks to all of our friends for thinking of Zoe and praying. Thank you to God for putting our family together..
Peace and happiness Bonnie
We should be getting out soon ,especially since the weather is suppose to rainy the rest of the week.

Zoe goes to the hospital

Zoe's surgery has been moved up to this friday. I rec'd the call yesterday am. we leave in an hour for her pre testing. Zoe and I toured the 4th floor where she will stay after. It is the same place that Desi stayed during his 3 week stay in 04 but they have revamped and updated everything. She is concerned she does not want to be asleep. They said in her China updates that she was not much for the naptime and boy they were not kidding.. Keep us all in your thoughts and prayers as I am sure I will be freaking oput the whole day friday. thanks

a new blog

here is the link to the new blog .Follow the tales of Zoe and she rules us all with her little finger and her big smile. 5 bugaboos was bling by my daughter Kelli,great job Kel.. thanks a bunch.

http://5bugaboos.blogspot.com/

Zoe's first pony ride...not loving it!!!


Photos of Zoe by Kelli wearing her new dress from Kel. holding Chowchow her cat and Minnie Tevins kitty

2 years ago I saw her face

First pictures


waiting for mama



home for 7 mos


This is the way it happened.As i was searching the internet for fabric i rec'd and email from the waiting child group and there she was,my girl, 2 years ago!!!

scroll to the bottom and work up to see the exact texts ....

IAAP - More children!
Posted by: "WaitingChild-owner@yahoogroups.com" WaitingChild-owner@yahoogroups.com alberhasky2000
Fri Jun 30, 2006 6:04 pm (PST)
Dang Xin Hui was born on June 15, 2004. Xin Hui was born with a
Ventricular Septal Defect (VSD) of her heart which has not been
repaired. Due to this condition, her motor skills are delayed; she
was not walking as of her report this spring. This beautiful little
one needs a family! Couples and single parents under the age of 50
are preferred by the CCAA.

Dang Xin Hui - girl - 6/15/2004Sunday, July 2, 2006 8:42 AM
From: "Richard Graham" View contact details To: "bonnie pontillo" Bonnie, We have marked her as placed with your family. We want to be sure you understand that we do not know the exact reasons for her delays and there is no way of knowing until she is here. As you know, with heart babies they are prone to gross motor skill delays due to their conditions. However, there is no way to adequately evaluate her while she is still in China to find the true source of these delays. We need your full name, address and phone. When we return from vacation we will fedex the pre-approval forms to you. Have a great day. Cheryl

----- Original Message ----
From: bonnie pontillo
To: Richard Graham
Sent: Saturday, July 1, 2006 4:30:54 PM
Subject: Re: Dang Xin Hui - girl - 6/15/2004

Hi Cheryl I hate to bother you again and on a weekend but just in case I wasnt clear in my previous posts , I would like to be dang Xin Hui momma. I know that its states that she could not walk yet but that the info was from March . I have a few concerns but I am aware that developement delays are the norm in institutionalized children but I also know that these kids usually catch up quickly with the love and attention of a family. I did speak to someone who has adopted two children thru your agency and she gave you a resounding recommendation so I am ready to proceed. we have been buying clothes and toys for our "Zoe" for a few months and are in the process of starting to decorating her/toy room . Please let me kow what happens next? Thank you for your time as well as for the great work that you do on behalf of children and families; Bonnie

Richard Graham wrote:
Bonnie, You don't need to have a complete dossier or homestudy in order to commit to adopt a child. We only need to know that you meet the CCAA requirements, and are ready to commit to follow through with the adoption. Let us know if this is your daughter! Cheryl

----- Original Message ----
From: bonnie pontillo
To: Richard Graham
Sent: Saturday, July 1, 2006 9:15:28 AM
Subject: Re: Dang Xin Hui - girl - 6/15/2004

Hi Richard I have started my homestudy and collecting the dossier requirements. How paper ready do you need to be? I have been researching adoption for over a year and am ready to find my daughter . Thank you Bonnie

Richard Graham wrote:
Bonnie, All the information we have about her is on the site. Our fees for waiting children are very low; this includes the orphanage donation, agency fee, CCAA fee, and fees in the province. We do not place children on hold; if you qualify under the CCAA requirements and are ready to commit to a child, then the child is assigned to you. Let us know if you have any other questions. CherylIAAP

----- Original Message ----
From: bonnie pontillo
To: iaap@iaapadoption.com
Sent: Friday, June 30, 2006 6:44:02 PM
Subject: Dang Xin Hui - girl - 6/15/2004

Hi I was wondering if i could get more information about about Dang Xin Hui - girl - 6/15/2004 . And also about your special needs programs. thank you Bonnie

The Fourth and now summer

We celebrated the 4th of July by going down to the lake and watching the display. I remember last year thinking next year we will bring Zoe. Zoe was very excited in the car seeing the fireworks in the sky as we draove to our spot. We got out and brought the blanket , as I went to sit down to put Zoe on my lap to share in this great experience,Tevin says"umm... Mom Zoe left" I looked back and there she was sprinting back to the car any car would do I think.She looked like a cartoon, one leg up as she raced outta there. We lasted about 15 mins and then she really wanted to leave.Oh well maybe next year. We had to turn down sister Kelli invite to watch the Fireworks at her house the next night.
We did nothing on the 4th until about 7 pm and then we went and played mini golf. It was fun Zoe enjoyed herself . GuyGuy tripped over the edging and almost went in the water. The boys were good sports and I was happy that they decided to join in.
We went on sunday to long point park , which back when I was a youngin had rides,a skating rink ,food stands but due to a fire and developement there is not much left . Zoe enjoyed venturing in the water . She seemed like a natural when I held her body she kicked and swam with her arms without me telling her.She loves the water and beach even before she visited , another mystery.

3rd week in june

we celebrated Zoe's birthday with a cake at Shari's house.Zoe loved being sung to and blowing out the candles but the cake ? not so much. She received some wonderful presents Kelli made a gorgeous card. Kelli Zoe ,me and desmond went to pick strawberries. You may notice kelli worked some magic with her photoshop and made my butt magically disappear.. now if it were that easy in real life.

Zoe had her 6 months check at the cardiologist and they did an ultrasound. The news was definately not what I was expecting. Up until now we had been told she would need no treatment .. but things change.. The Dr told me that Zoe will need open heart surgery to close the hole. The hole is small but as it tries to close it is sucking in part of the valves and this will lead to bigger problems. We can wait awhile ,its not an immediate issue and she is doing very well. She goes to her pediatrician on monday for her 4 yr check up.

second week in June

the second week in June we were invited to visit With a family that had adopted in Nov LingLing from Zoe's fostercare center. The girls lived together for almost a year. The family is from VA but were up visiting family in central NY. They would be about 30 mins from my sisters house so we decided to visit with Michelle and Rick. We met up with the Family and its was nice to the girls together. Zoe was not too friendly. She told us before that Ling Ling no like me.We found out that Zoe thought they we were giving her to LingLing(noelle)family. I guess even after 6 mos she still has some confusion.

Catching up.

I can not believe how fast June has gone by. Several things to update. Zoe had her first dental cleaning and NO cavities. pretty amazing considering she's been in a orphange and all the sweets they allow them.
The first week in June we attended the Dragonboat Festival at Riverside Park In rochester. I forced the teen boys to come,no one would help me with the "boat"for the float but once they saw how put together most of them were I am hoping to have help next year. it was great to see all the kids and having Zoe with us this year. They had a parade around and Zoe's boat won most colorful,its good to have glitter.I thouught they were giving awards to everyone but they only gave out 5. Really Zoe didnt have a clue so she would not have been upset. She refused to pose for pictures ,thats her in the middle looking up at the ceiling. She said there were too many cameras. all those parent clicking away. She let her dragon wear the medal. what a sweetie. when I say that to her she says back "you called me sweetie mommy" then"your my sweetie mommy" She is very cute except ... she was hightailing it across the park to the playground and I told her to stop she turned around and looked at me .. I swear i heard her hiss.. thats her trying to recreate the look.
It was a very hot day. we all had fun although Zoe would not talk or play with any of the kids

zoes guitar

Zoe singing and playing her new guitar on the very first day...I was quite impressed by her natural talent.. She is singing about a bathing suit and going to the beach...

Memorial Day Parade

Zoe's first parade... We attended the Memorial Day Parade ... it was Zoe's first. She seemed to like it, after we ate at dennys and then later went to get ice cream at Minnehans. Zoe's first cone... she said"mama we come tomarrow for more?"

cuter everyday

It seems to me this little girl gets cuter every day, i may be biased,but judge for yourself !!!
Zoe has wanted a bike every since she tried a neighbors out so Friday I found one at Aldi's( zoe knows so much , as I pulled into the parking lot she asked"we going to Aldi's? get food")I put the Dora one on the cart but when I was a few feet away she stopped me and said "deigo bike".She already has a Dora car that sister Shari gave her last month for her bday(Zoe's bday is June 15th but Shari could not wait). Here is a photo of Zoe and her car... we are pretty sure that Shari taught her these driving skills!! Lets hope Zoe doesn't end up driving on the golf course or into the bushes.


Yesterday we were at the house gutting the basement and we noticed all the twirly whirls(the seeds from the trees)spinning thru the air Zoe was trying to catch them.

We also went and visited the newest neighbor,Casey , a 6 month old chocolate lab, Zoe did not enjoy this as Casey licked her face and then jumped on her.She still has issues with Keena and her tail.We are hoping Keena and Casey can have some playdates.

tragedy and loss

link to story http://members.shaohannahshope.org/site/News2?page=NewsArticle&id=6259

There has been so much tragedy and loss in the world recently, the earthquake in China and then this morning finding out about Maria, The 5 yo adopted daughter of Steven Curtis Chapman who passed away after an accident at the family's home. I know how closely I have come to losing my kids in freak accident and that but for the Grace of God they were spared. I can not imagine the grief Maria's family is feeling. I pray that God will lift them up again in spirit and belief..peace Bonnnie




"I'll lend to you for a little time,
A child of mine," God said,
"For you to love while she lives
And mourn for when she's dead."

"It may be six or seven years
Or twenty-two or three,
But will you till I call her back,
Take care of her for me?"

"She'll bring her charms to gladden you
And should her stay be brief,
You'll have these precious memories
To comfort you through grief."

"I cannot promise she will stay
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there
I want this child to learn."

"I've looked this world over,
In my search for teachers true.
In the crowds of this great land,
I have selected you."

"Now will you give her all your love
Not think the labor vain,
Nor hate me when I come to call
To take her back again?"


It seems to me I heard them say,
"Dear Lord, thy will be done.
For all the joys a child shall bring,
The risk of grief we'll run."

"We'll shelter her with tenderness,
We'll love her while we may,
And for the happiness we've known
Forever grateful stay."

"And should the angels call for her
Much sooner than we've planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes
And try to understand."

© Edgar A. Guest

The rest of the family

Me and the kids ventured down to Ithaca the 2nd weekend in April,when all the snow of the week before had melted and temps were in the 60's.
Zoe was able to meet her guardians should anything happen to me, Aunt Michelle and Uncle Rick. She of course loved them.

Later Aunt Becky, uncle Brian and cousin Meghan came by to visit. we stayed 2 nights and had a great time catching up. They all agreed that Zoe was the perfect kid for our family. Aunt Barb and Jasmine and jonathain came by for a quick visit and the day greeted us with a snowstorm, luckily nothing stuck, but I am tired of the white stuff.Zoe loved all the cute gifts from the family but really thought it was cool to finally meet most of the family. Mainly Grandma is the last one to meet her.Zoe talks on the phone to her often. This year to save time since Grandma isnt coming up until July, we thought we would meet her at the airport have lunch and send her back to Florida just kidding. But her visits get shorter each year. we are starting to plan our florida vacation for the fall. Thats most of the news for now.
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5 month update

I can not believe how quickly the time with Zoe has passed when the time without her seemed to drag on forever. Zoe is doing amazingly in every aspect. Health wise she has had only an occasional cold. She had a scan of her kidney,liver,and bladder and they all were ok. She goes in june for her heart ultrasound,we are praying for good news on that front also.
Everyday I am thankful that this little girl is here. How wonderous the journey that brought us together.How is it that this beautiful child is from the other side of the world now calls me mama? It feels as if she has always been a part of the family but I am surprised to see her everyday. Zoe is a very happy, sweet ,friendly girl. I think she is so much nicer than she would have been if I had rec'd her as a baby. The timing was as it should have been. She brings such joy everyday in our lives. Zoe is speaking English at the same level as other kids her age. Her favorites TV shows are Nia ho KiaLan,Diego and Dora,wonder pets. She is starting to make friends with our dog Keena,taking her for "walks".
I had a nice Mother's day. Zoe wished me " a happy chinese mama new year"

Zoe's motor skills are growing by leaps and bounds. She loves riding her scooter

Big sister Kelli has been designing tshirts for an online contests and her Tshirt for the theme mothers day won first place. Its shows a mama dragon feeding her baby dragon a knight in shining armor. I don't remember feeding her one but times were tough hmmm .. that would explain why there was a lack of knights for me... oh well... Great job Kelli, we are as always so proud of you. Zoe is modeling Kellis prize winning design.. She is grumpy because " the sun is poking my eyes". Kelli's shirt sold over 2000 in the first 8 hrs. Pretty neat thinking folks all over will be wearing her artwork.. If you would like to get one for yourself they are $15 ,free shipping. Warning the womens sizes run small,the mens sizes are fine.Its called 'dragonly love'
http://shirt.woot.com/friends.aspx?k=5463

another month together

So much has happened in the past month... Zoe's blood test came back all good but she still has to go see the kidney specialist next month to find out why she has so much blood in her urine. desi has been to the drs every week he has appts at the head specialist and skin dr, dentist and eye.Tevin just has the dentist and eyes to do. Zoe is talking so well in English. She has such a cute way of saying yes to a question ,... she does a a little ummm... and then yes. She continues to torment her bros and vice versa. Finally those boyz are getting a taste of what they put their big sisters thru, when they were the terror twosome. Zoe has to be watched like a hawk. She did manage to find the scissors and trim her hair, barely noticeable except to me.. I asked her "Zoe did you cut your hair with the scissors?" " ummm... Yes" She also cut up some fabric that I had ready to put into a quilt.
I can not believe I went all the way to China to finally have my Italian girl. She loves pasta, and can really pack away the food. But she is very sweet and always feeds mama some but she is not so good with sharing food with anyone else. her favorite movie is HAPPY FEET and she loves penguins. Shari found her a walking talking mambo animal and zoe just adores it. She also likes going to the movie theater,eating out, and to walmart.
Some firsts:
we attending the FCC Chinese News year, Zoe finally has met an aunt and some cousins. My sister Brenda , who donated her FF miles for Zoe's ticket and who waited at the Detroit airport for us,we did not have enough time to find her, drove with her youngest 2 , thru a blizzard from Michigan to NY to be able to be the first aunty to meet Zoe. Love was definitely in the air. Hosni and Gabriella(7 and 5 this july)wanted to take her home with them, I think their mom was coaching them a Little!!! we had a great time visiting and Zoe went to her first museum . They gave her a beautiful chinese outfit that Brenda picked out in San Fran's Chinatown last summer.Zoe cried and cried , and wanted to trade me in, when they had to leave..

Zoe also discovered the bumblebee costume and wore it for 2 days straight. She also does a song and dance in chinese that is so cute. She is anxiously awaitying the arrival of her friend and foster mate LuQi(Dannica). Zoe practices talking to her in chinese often.
I need to again thank my big girls so much.Shari and Kelli share zoe sitting and it makes one less thing to worry about

2 months since we met

Its been 2 months since Zoe first cast that disapproving look at me, for taking so darn long to get her. These day if she is mad at you she will give you the look and then yell at you in chinese, not sure what she is saying but i am sure it isnt good.
so many firsts this month. we went bowling last week with the kids. Zoe had a blast. She has also discover the portable DVd player which she thinks is her personal tv. She loves sesame street now and understands much of what is said. she talk in both english and chinese. she is adjusting well to her daycare schedule,Sister Sharis house 2-3 nights and the sis Kelli stays at our house 2 nights a week. What a blessing and a relief that these girls have come thru so wonderfully.